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Hello, my name is Frank and I am NOT a member of Non-Atheists Anonymous.  But I am the Founder of this most recent copycat of A.A., after Narcotics Anonymous, Gamblers Anonymous, Overeaters Anonymous, Sexual Compulsives Anonymous, Clutterers Anonymous, Debtors Anonymous and Workaholics Anonymous (all of these actually exist !).   (If ever I was an authentic alcoholic, I don’t imbibe any more.  I gave up the grog five years, two months, thirteen days and thirty-five minutes ago.  Do I miss my morning Macallam (Single Malt, Speyside) ?  Naaah . . .).

Naturally N-A.A. has Twelve Steps, just as Jesus had Twelve Apostles.  You may not have noticed but A.A.’s Twelve Steps – in keeping with the second of its “Twelve Traditions” – is anything but Non-Atheist.  Tradition 2 reads : “There is but one ultimate authority – a loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience.”  The Twelve Steps themselves mention God explicity in no less than 6 of the 12, and end with one that speaks of the alkies’ “spiritual awakening” (Step 12) : A.A. members “believe in a Power greater than themselves” (Step 2), “turn their will and lives over to the care of God” (Step 3), “admit to God the existence of other wrongs” (Step 5), are “ready to have God remove their shortcomings” (Step 6), “humbly ask Him to remove (such) shortcomings” (Step 7) and “seek through prayer and meditation to improve their conscious contact with God as they understand Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for them and the power to carry that out” (Step 11).

A.A.’s Twelve Steps are a veritable Act of Faith.  Believers on the Brink can forget about joining A.A.  But they are ideal candidates for my N-A.A., because they are still (partially) Believers, Non-Atheists on the way to enlightenment.  They need the support, the encouragement and the testimonies of others like themselves still hooked on the Opium of the People and the inebriating Divine Nectar of the Bible, which have made them all dependent on the comforting illusions of an afterlife and the glorious reward of an eternity in Heaven, with or without their 72 virgins (or their one and only virgin of 72 : it depends on whether you read from left to right, as in English, or from right to left as in Arabic).

Our meetings will allow you to hear some of the horror-stories of how other Non-Atheists have persecuted themselves with guilty consciences for peccadiloes or perfectly normal human behavior, have prayed in vain for rain and even for the recovery of a loved one, a spouse or an infant, have been scared half to death by fire-and-brimstone preachers and have wasted their money supporting the Propagation of the Faith.  You will recognize the readings that begin each of our meetings.  They are all taken from this Blog or my book, “From Illusions to Illumination”.  They were written for you.  So join up today.  N-A.A. is not only free of charge.  It will make you free, free at last, from blind faith and blind folly.

RIDENDA   RELIGIO

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